Back To School Teen Mental Health

One of our biggest concerns as a society, especially over the past few years, is teen mental health. Now that it’s time to head back to school, these fears are compounded.

Just about every parent of a teen, or any child really, worries about how he will fare when school starts again after a free summer break. It’s the beginning of a new grade level, academic structures and social pressures.

We can’t help but feel worry and watch our kids with eyeballs wide open. Will she make new friends? Be interested in extracurricular activities? Handle the academics? Find a new crowd? Will it be a good-influence crowd? Especially if your child has had some struggles in the past, a new school year can be stressful for the whole family.

As the parent, you can help your teen prioritize his own mental health by understanding the challenges he faces, by keeping communication open and showing compassion.

Understanding the challenges.

As your teen tries to find a purpose and place in the world, it’s inevitable that challenges will pop up. These are times to show support and keep lines of communication open. Some of these challenges are likely to include:

Academic Pressure – Your child may face an increased workload, high expectations from teachers, college entrance requirements and self expectations.
Social Dynamics – This is a time of peer pressure, social hierarchies, exclusion and sometimes bullying,
Extracurricular Activities – Your teen may struggle with the time management of balancing sports, clubs and other interests, along with schoolwork. If he has a job, that is more added pressure.
Changes and Transitions – Your child might be experiencing school transitions, as well as a new grade level, depending on his or her age, and whether you have recently moved. Getting used to new schedules and new routines adds another level of stress.
Exposure to unhealthy habits – We don’t have the control of knowing how and when other kids are influencing our own in such things like drugs, alcohol and skipping school.
Driving – Learning to drive and the new freedom it allows is fun for our teenager, however it is also a source of stress.

Recognizing mental health struggles.

When you take the time to intentionally check in with your child daily, you might recognize some early signs of mental health struggles. I’ve found that some of the best times to have an uninterrupted conversation with your teen is when we are driving. I’ve found that they open up more when we are looking at a road, rather than each other.

Other times to talk peacefully could be bedtime, at the dinner table, or while waiting for an extracurricular activity to begin.

You’ll want to look for these signs that your teen may be having a hard time:

Persistent sadness or irritability
Sudden mood swings
Changes in sleeping or eating habits
Sudden loss of interest in activities that used to be enjoyed
Declines in grades or performance
Having trouble concentrating
Low energy levels
New unexplained health problems, like headaches or stomachaches
Finds excuses to not go to school

How to support your teen.

The best way to support teen mental health is through active listening. Encourage them to share any feelings, validate what they are sharing and stay non-reactive. I highly encourage practicing motivational interviewing skills. To know more about Motivational Interviewing, a start would be here.

Active listening means that you let your child speak, then you show signs that you are listening. With eye contact, nod your head occasionally or say encouraging words. Some statements you might give are:

“That sounds hurtful.”

“Wow, I would be angry about that too.”

“It sounds like you are having a hard time keeping up with your schedule. How can I support you?”

“I notice you seem to have low energy lately. Is there something I can do to help?”

The important thing is that you don’t judge your child, you don’t give unwanted advice and you don’t criticize your child’s character. Instead of…

“You should…”
“You should have never…”
“You need to …”

you could say:

“I had a similar situation once. This is how I handled it.”
“Would you like to talk through some possible solutions?”
“What would be an outcome of ____”?

The goal is to get your child talking. When you try to force your opinion or suggestions, your teen will probably start to shut down.

When to seek professional help.

It is time to seek professional support when you notice red flags such as persistent distress or expressions of self-harm. If your child expresses or gives hints of suicidal thoughts, it is imperative that you get help immediately.

To find the right support, you will want to seek out therapy or counseling services through referrals. School counselors, psychologists or therapeutic consultants can be a great resource.

Empower your teen to take charge of their own mental health.

This can be given by modeling and encouraging your own self-care practices, mental health practices and showing that you are an imperfect human being that has struggles also. Demonstrate how to use healthy coping mechanisms like exercise, journaling, spending time in nature and surrounding yourself with healthy friends and family.

If your child has proven irresponsible in the past, give (and show) them alternative healthy options from which to choose. Foster resilience by encouraging a growth mindset and problem-solving skills. Celebrate your child’s wins along the way.

Seeking support for mental health is a strength, not a weakness. There will always be challenges that come up in life. Support, whether it’s through a parent or otherwise, is the biggest and most important step to conquer anything.

**If your teen expresses suicidal thoughts, contact local emergency health services or dial 988 for the International Association for Suicide Prevention.

Schedule a no-cost discovery call with Rae Guyer, your therapeutic consultant to discuss your teen’s mental health.

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