Attachment Trauma: What Is It & How to Notice It

Attachment trauma: What is it?

Attachment trauma refers to psychological and emotional difficulties in having healthy relationships due to the disruptive, negligent or problematic early relationships one has had from primary caregivers.

It is a disruption of the healthy relationship that should have been formed between a child and their primary caregiver. This early childhood experience(s) can affect the ability to bond and have positive relationships throughout their complete lives. Untreated, the person with attachment trauma will have difficulty in relationships.

This in turn, will lead to other mental health concerns.

Early childhood is a critical time for forming attachments. Secure attachments form the foundation for healthy emotional and social development. Trauma during this period can disrupt the development of trust and security.

Reasons attachment traumas will be formed:

Neglect. Lack of consistent care, emotional support and nurturing.

Abuse. Physical, emotional or sexual abuse by a caregiver.

Separation. Prolonged separation from primary caregivers, such as due to illness, death or abandonment.

Attachment trauma is never the fault of the child.

Including the above, and in addition, there are other life events within a family that can precipitate attachment trauma; such as divorce, death of a parent, death of a sibling and a parent whom emotionally or financially struggles to care for the child (or for themselves). Although unknowingly, these life circumstances can cause attachment trauma.

Attachment disruptions also take place through no fault of the caregiver in a situation such as a baby spending time in the NICU after birth. Instead of spending those precious moments soaking up their caregiver, NICU babies tend to develop attachment disorders at a rate six times higher than the general population.

How to notice attachment trauma.

More than average anxiety
More than average depression
More than average mood swings
Difficulty managing emotions
Aggression
Lack of coping skills
Withdrawal from people
Difficulty forming relationships
Clinginess or avoidance
Negative self-concept and self-esteem
Sleep disturbances
Cognitive developmental delays

Sometimes we’ll see a fierce desire for independence or a need to be in control in all situations because they have so often been out of control in their relationships with a primary caregiver.

One might also err on the opposite end of the spectrum. A child may demand closeness with people to an inappropriate level, leaving others feeling uncomfortable. Then eventually the person feeling uncomfortable or smothered will leave the relationship which sets the spiral into motion again with the one with the attachment trauma.

Probably the most common side effect of attachment trauma is the long-term impact on accepting love. If a primary caregiver was able to abandon them, they may wonder what is inherently wrong with themselves.They will subconsciously not feel deserving of love or attention, therefore not receive love or not accept love.

The Different Attachment Styles.

Creating healthy relationships and boundaries with primary caregivers creates secure attachment and should be the goal of every family. However, when therapists work with this disorder, they will often categorize the symptoms into five different attachment styles.

Avoidant: Children who learn that parents are unreliable when it comes to meeting their needs will avoid future relationships because they never know how or when someone will let them down.

Disorganized: When caregivers are inconsistent (sometimes attentive but not always), a disorganized attachment style can present. This is indicated by unreliability where a child may alternate between a loving relationship and detachment from the same person.

Anxious: An anxious attachment style is also caused by inconsistency in formative years, but it instead creates anxiety in relationships rather than avoidance. They may face issues with any type of separation, never knowing if the person will return at the agreed-upon time.

In more extreme cases there are:

Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD): This is characterized by a consistent pattern of inhibited, emotionally withdrawn behavior toward adult caregivers. Children with RAD rarely seek comfort when distressed and may appear emotionally numb or unresponsive to nurturing.

Disinhibited Social Engagement Disorder (DSED): This involves a pattern of behavior where children actively approach and interact with unfamiliar adults. They may exhibit overly familiar behavior, lack appropriate boundaries and show little hesitation in engaging with strangers.

The Impact of Attachment Trauma on Mental Health.

Relationships suffer as a result of attachment trauma, and the issues can go deep beneath the surface and result in long-term difficulties.

Although not common, some children may develop more severe issues related to reactive attachment disorder. Studies show that roughly 1.4 percent of the population will be diagnosed with reactive attachment disorder which comes with some other serious concerns like a lower IQ and more comorbid conditions.

This often takes place due to abuse or neglect which prevents the child from forming healthier bonds as they age. Children with this diagnosis find it challenging to be in a healthy relationship of any kind.

These trials can be problematic for parents who want to connect with their children now but find it difficult to build a bridge to help them with emotional dysregulation. The long-term impact can have serious consequences for the entire family unit.

The good news is, attachment trauma /attachment disorder is treatable.

Therapeutic intervention is almost always successful in changing the trajectory into healthy bonds and long term relationships. Young children and into adulthood would benefit from attachment trauma therapy. Because of the cumulative hurt that comes from this, the earlier, is always better. It may take time, however it is realistic to transform attachment disorders into Secure Attachment.

A therapeutic placement may be necessary to provide the structure, support and environment that a child requires to deeply heal.

Therapeutic Educational Consulting offers a no cost discovery call if you would like to explore options for mental health treatment around attachment disorders. You may reach use here.

Photo credit, Halfpoint